No escape

For over 2 years I've tried to forget.

For over 2 years I've tried to put it behind me.

...but there is no escape. No matter hos much I try to hide among the surface dwellers. Try to become them. There is always the nagging feeling that I'm neglecting my duties. That someone else bears a heavier burden because I have given up.

The stars paint me with dismay. They remind me that I no longer contribute.

I know I should go out there and face the void again. But I'm not strong enough. The losses will eat away what's left of my soul.

I'm lost either way.

I am no longer worthy of those that sacrifice themselves to defend me.